Tuesday, 8 July 2014

SET FORTH AT DAWN: PART TWO by Florence Malouda

Of the continuation of life, passing exams and going to renowned national schools. It was the best four years of life that largely shaped who I am today, my grace or lack of thereof which is very rare by the way…climbing hurdles, occasionally passing math exams and finally passing the ultimate exams in high school which was not a surprise because I read hard anyway.

The initial days of making friends was not a problem, naturally, I got many friends but gradually became withdrawn when each and every situation keeps reminding you, no, something is not a little right with you :D and of answering questions according to the seating arrangements. IT’S YOUR TURN!!! Which one?


Long and excruciating double Kiswahili Fasihi lessons with mumbling teachers, I have nothing against Kiswahili in fact, I’m deeply intrigued by this language. I just wish my teacher was a whole lot more dramatic.

It is now time to go to a qualified specialist. So on Fridays I’ll miss those classes (yes!) to go to town (Lion’s Eye Bank, Loresho, the Ear Unit) with many a great hopes for salvation and behold I’d warned my friends, “Be careful what you say about me now.” They just smiled.


And truly words cannot express the crushing disappointment I had when I got my first hearing aid. It was analogue, the one in the picture above, left and lasted only 3 weeks though my dad came all the way from home at the call from the school to pay a whooping 40k for that was the price of an analogue piece of junk.

When a hole developed in the plastic tube, I could no longer use it. It produced a funny whistling sound that made the class laugh. Then I had to use the spare one, which also, a few days later, malfunctioned! I was in form two by then and had days of Kiswahili lessons to endure till the Friday to go look for the doctor.

But he says, this is a big problem, Florence. I am just a doctor there is nothing I can do I would have to send it back to Germany but it’s not worth it. In my head, me and my classmates invent new hearing aids and set up a factory in Nairobi. And voila! The doctor gives me another analogue pair (above right) for FREE. I still strongly feel that my father should go and claim back the money he had paid earlier.

Anyway I made through my second form and most of my third form, scribbling Kiswahili nonsense in my book during the Fasihi and set book sessions. I do not hate Kiswahili. During a career fair I found a brochure from the Upper Hill medical Centre guys about the more advanced devices of technology and three months later I had me a customized digital gadget from South Africa. Praise Jesus, though they cost a fortune, I was better off.
It served me diligently for almost two years, then one fateful night; I woke up to the sinister feeling of a silhouette was hovering over my bedroom window. Ah I’m just groggy. It shone a spotlight through the window. Ah my sister went to pee and now she wants to scare me. In the morning, the window pane was broken and a couple of my stuff on the table near the window was gone and with them my impressive piece of technology. The silhouette the thief, I hope it serves him well.

Mother flew into a fit of rage but we never found the silhouette. We are now back to where we started but let’s pretend it does not matter. When the figure in the bank reads 100k, we will be fine again. And now, in the pursuit of errant dreams, there are fears that cripple at times for the future is uncertain and the system, it takes a shrewd mind to work around the system and that, I will.

Pain wanders through my bones like a lost fire. What burns me now? Desire, desire, desire. Those words of Sir Theodore Roethke aptly describe my life and dreams. My faith wavers, but only for a while, fears confine me, but not for so long a time. Because I’m a firm believer that the tragedy of life is what we let die inside of us while we live, therefore I will set forth at dawn for my dreams to pursue, whatever it takes, having to face my fears from time to time but cowering not.










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